Terrene Spire.
Terrene Spire was made almost four years ago, just around when undertale came out.
Terrene Spire started four months before my dad died.
Terrene Spire started six months before my mom found out she has dementia.
Terrene Spire was worked upon as another of my passion projects for years and years, thought about, functionally defining an entire combat system, an interactive menu and everything that entails.
Terrene Spire has been an incredible ride but also born in the absolutely toughest and most traumatic part of my life.
While I suffered my brother’s injustices, Terrene Spire was there as a thing I thought about constantly.
While I helped my mother grieve over my father, Terrene Spire was there.
My mother has never gotten over dad. Mom’s still grieving him, but the dementia has left her docile and she doesnt think of him a lot.
My brother went insane trying to keep his idea of our family together.
Four months ago I asked my brother to never contact me again.
a month after that he got married to his GF.
I ran away and he got his finger out of his ass because his easy workhorse wasnt listening anymore.
And through all my strife, my constant arguing, my attempts at making these narcissists understand that I am not a neurotypical person and I dont have the resources they demand of me…
Terrene Spire was there.
I have almost 20 gigabytes of Terrene Spire files on my PC.
Terrene Spire’s image files, JUST the image files, is already over 2500 images.
I feel like hell for saying that I don’t feel any joy from making Terrene Spire anymore.
I made it for the very reason I made all my other stories. I made them for attention.
The only positive attention in my life is the reactions to my stories.
It’s not hyperbole to say that you people have saved me from wanting to kill myself many times over these, four years.
Four years of Terrene Spire.
And I feel so little anymore. I dont want to work on Terrene Spire anymore.
I poured my heart and soul into it all through the hardest part of my life that I have ever been through.
Terrene Spire.
I feel like an asshole for saying I dont want to work on Terrene Spire anymore.
You guys have given me so much, you have even given me ACTUAL FUCKING MONEY, something I have, regretted, a LOT.
I feel like a thief, a cheat and a scamp, an absolute monster.
I have wasted your money again and again.
At the same time that money has helped me stay alive…
And its all because of this forum and Terrene Spire.
And I dont want to work on Terrene Spire anymore.
I dont know what else to say.
I am sorry everyone. I have failed you once more.
“Why don’t you try writing an ending for once.”
“Why don’t you try writing an ending for once.”
“Why don’t you write an ending for once.”
“why.”
“why.”
“why.”