Crashed Archive
- Ch. 0: The Crash.
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- Simon: Channel fire into the crowbar, bash vine enemy head thing.
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- Simon: Swing.
- Simon: Get close…
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- Simon: Ready thine crowbar…
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- Simon: If he does become hostle, we could also utilize those barrels donkey kong style.
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- Simon: Wait for a minute before checking to see if he’s left.
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- Simon: Excuse yourself and go to the right/behind you.
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- Simon: Apologize, but ask what he’s willing to do to help you.
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- Simon: Inquire about where you are.
- Simon: Ask them why being a Keeper is incredible.
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- Simon: ask if he’s got any clothes or something to cover up with. It’s a bit embarrassing to be in such attire.
- Simon: Explain that a spirit creature (who also revived you after you died) said you might have flashed in from an alternate universe.
- Simon: Ask the helmeted man how to exit the Fortress.
- Simon: Ask if he’s seen any glimmer elementals or zombies prowling around.
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- Simon: obey his instruction to calm down.
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- Simon: Your Name is Simon, You mean no harm, hello.
- Simon: Declare yourself to be Fluffernutter of the Butterfluff Clan!
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- Simon: Check those valves. Is there running water?
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- Simon: Examine boxes. Are they also full of seeds?
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- Simon: Go downstairs.
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- Simon: Grab a brick and check out that railing.
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- Simon: Does it even hurt though?
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- Simon: Do the crystals feel warmer?
- Simon: We’re a guardian or whatever right? Try telepathiclly contactic Rose.
- Simon: See if you can go back to space by touching the Junction.
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- Simon: use strips of tire rubber as improvised straps.
- Simon: Take Tire Hubcap as Improvised Shield!
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- Simon: Hubcap I say! Pry it off with the crowbar!
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- Simon: Eat the fruit.
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- Simon: Find a stick to poke it with.
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- Simon: Bricks, my man. Stand on those.
- Simon: Take the strange purple fruit.
- Simon: Eat the pretty flower things!
- Simon: Investigate all the barrels.
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- Simon: What’s in the box-type dealios?
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- Simon: Check gender. If no change, look further for ‘different’.
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- Simon: What are those things on your head?
- Put crowbar down back of shirt.
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- Simon: use crowbar to open a barrel. Inspect contents.
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- Simon: Inspect bottle of green potion on the ground.
- Simon: Is it cold here? Should finding clothes be a priority?
- Simon: What happened to your Jacket? And where’d you get those spiffy shorts.
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- Simon: Put as many old bottles as fit into our pockets into our pockets.
- Simon: Do a bit of practice crowbar-swings.
- Simon: Wield the weapon of the free man.
- Simon: Take Tire Iron as weapon.
- Simon: Loot all.
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- Simon: This place is dangerous, search your car for a weapon.
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- Simon: Look around for hostiles.
- Simon: The car is likely guarded by our zombie body.
- Simon: Be ready to fight yourself as a zombie?
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- Simon: ask for clarification on what elements there are.
- Simon: Ask how do we go about getting a new body.
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- Simon: Ask what a Crystal Junction is and does.
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- Simon: Outsider? Outside of what?
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- Simon: Ask Rose what in the Hell is going on.
- Simon: Also ask about the green spider cat things.
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- Simon: “Where was I when I… died?”
- Simon: Flex new form. Are we able to feel anything?
- Simon: React negatively to the realization that you now have a ghost butt.
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- []: Remember our name.
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- []: Full frontal attack!
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- []: Do only the kick this turn.
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- []: Kick it in the face, dunkass!
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- []: Get some distance on those critters by climbing your car.
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- []: screech like a Pterodactyl at them whilst casting brick!
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- []: Grab a loose brick or something to defend yourself with.
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- []: Turn around!
- []: Crack it open!
- []: Are the orange things labels? If so, read some of them.
- []: Test the durability a bit.
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- []: Try pressing the diamond in the middle of the thing.
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- []: Examine that big floaty purple thing.
- []: Check the ceiling.
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- []: Recall the events leading up to the crash.
- []: Where did you enter from? Check the other side of the room.
- []: investigate the goddamn polar bear you seem to have run over.
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- Crashed.